June 20th,
2003
My marriage of
almost 17 years ends with the simple words of goodbye.
Very little warning,
though in hindsight, I guess I was blind. Blind to many things
that I should have seen, or maybe that I wanted to see but my
eyes refused to focus upon, sheilding me to the truth and veiling
my life in the shadows of hope.
Though, the end
of my life as I knew it, it was the begining of something new.
A change in the air, a rebirth, a time to recapture the dreams
I had set aside for the man I would have died for.
And, perhaps I
did.
Enough of that,
it's a common story of two lives living seperately and finally
breaking apart, to journey off on thier own. You can hear it
a hundred times a day, nothing new here. Move along, nothing
to see.
It took me a while
to start again, though I tried to "move on" as quickly
as I could for the sake of my dear daughters. My own childhood
was one of divorce and I could hardly bear the fact that now
they were victims of our bittersweet end. I still carry a hollow
place in my heart for my family that disinegrated before my eyes
as a 9 year old girl in Michigan. Hardly any warning, blind again.
I seek a place
for my soul to rest, to live and feel joy and true contentment.
Perhaps others have the same thoughts, the same desires. Feel
free to come along for the journey, write if you'd like. I'm
always one to chat... I'd love to hear the wisdom of those who
have come before me and found their way back to the fold. Or
others of a like mind that are seeking and searching. Let's shoulder
the burden and enjoy the adventure together.
This is my ongoing
journal, a place to start again, to share my adventure and to
bring my soul home to rest. I hope that you will share my journey
and learn from my mistakes, perhaps offer a bit of wisdom, and
enjoy the ride. I'll try and write often, though it might not
be daily. Might be... sometimes. I hope to offer up my thoughts
and information as I go along. My goal? A homeplace for my soul.
I don't know where that is, yet.
I'll let you know
when I find it.
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